Love isn’t supposed to hurt. Love should feel safe, supportive, and respectful. It’s okay to have disagreements, but you should never feel afraid, controlled, or torn down by someone who says they love you.


Love builds you up, it doesn’t break you. If something feels off or painful, it’s okay to talk about it. You deserve to feel safe and valued in every relationship.


Continue exploring this page to learn more...



But what is

Domestic Violence?

According to the US Department of Justice

Domestic Violence:

  • Is a pattern of abusive behavior
  • Occurs in intimate partner relationships
  • Is used to gain or maintain power and control
  • Domestic Violence can take many forms






Types of Abuse

Physical

Physical abuse is when someone uses their body or an object to hurt, control, or intimidate another person. This can include hitting, slapping, pushing, choking, or any other action that causes pain or injury. It’s a form of power and control, and it is never okay.


Emotional

Emotional abuse is when someone uses words or actions to control, hurt, or break down another person’s self-worth. This can include constant criticism, manipulation, threats, isolation, or making someone feel afraid, worthless, or crazy. It’s a powerful form of abuse that can be just as damaging as physical harm.

Technology

Technological abuse is when someone uses phones, social media, GPS, or other technology to control, stalk, harass, or intimidate another person. This can include tracking someone's location, reading their messages, controlling their online accounts, or spreading harmful content. It’s a form of power and control that invades privacy and creates fear.

Financial

Financial abuse is when someone controls or limits another person’s access to money, resources, or the ability to work in order to gain power and control. This can include taking their paycheck, ruining their credit, or not allowing them to make financial decisions. It’s a way to keep someone dependent and trapped in the relationship.

Sexual

Sexual abuse is when someone forces or pressures another person into sexual activity without their consent. This includes any unwanted touching, coercion, assault, or using sex as a form of control, even within a relationship. Everyone has the right to say no, and consent must be freely given every time.

Psychological

Psychological abuse is when someone uses fear, threats, intimidation, or mind games to control or manipulate another person. It can involve gaslighting, making the victim doubt their reality, or isolating them from friends and family. This type of abuse can deeply affect a person’s mental and emotional well-being over time.


Survivor Story


I learned to check my phone constantly, not because I wanted to, but because I was afraid of what would happen if I missed a message. I stopped seeing friends, changed how I dressed, and second-guessed every decision. Nothing was ever openly violent, yet I felt trapped, anxious, and slowly losing pieces of myself.

Survivor Story


I remember the first time they grabbed my arm—it was fast, then followed by an apology and promises it would never happen again. But it did. Pushing, blocking doorways, bruises hidden under long sleeves. They said I made them lose control. I started believing it, living on edge, always walking on eggshells trying to prevent the next argument.


tell me more about...

Coercive Control

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviors that someone uses to dominate and control another person, often without physical violence. These behaviors often happen gradually, making them harder to recognize and can include things like constant monitoring, isolation from friends and family, controlling money or daily activities, and making threats. The goal is to take away the victim’s independence, confidence, and freedom.


Domestic Violence & PTSD

Neurobiology of Trauma

Our brain works hard to keep us emotionally and physically safe. Your brain may help by numbing feelings, forgetting painful memories, or by going along with things (fawning) just to avoid getting hurt.


These are survival strategies - the brain's way of protecting you until you're safe again.


Domestic Violence & PTSD

Non-Fatal Strangulation

Add brief Description


Use the links below to assess your own relationship and safety.

Are you concerned that you are

in an Abusive Relationship?

Healthy Relationship Quiz

EVERYONE DESERVES TO BE IN A SAFE AND HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP.


DO YOU KNOW IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS HEALTHY?


ANSWER YES OR NO TO THE QUESTIONS TO FIND OUT.


Credit: LoveIsRespect.org

Danger Assessment

A lethality assessment is an evaluation that predicts the likelihood of serious injuries or death. It provides an easy and effective method to identify victims of domestic violence who are at the highest risk of being seriously injured or killed by their intimate partners.


Several risk factors have been associated with increased risk of homicides (murders) of women and men in violent relationships. We cannot predict what will happen in your case, but we would like you to be aware of the danger of homicide in situations of abuse and for you to see how many of the risk factors apply to your situation.


Jacquelyn C. Campbell, Ph.D., R.N. Copyright, 2003; update 2019; www.dangerassessment.com